The Buggy Whip Business

Henny Youngman had a joke that went something like this:

        A man calls a lawyer's office. The phone is answered, "Schwartz, Schwartz, Schwartz and Schwartz." The man says, "Let me talk to Mr. Schwartz." "I'm sorry, he's on vacation." "Then let me talk to Mr. Schwartz." "He's on a big case, not available for a week." "Then let me talk to Mr. Schwartz." "He's playing golf today." "Okay, then, let me talk to Mr. Schwartz." "Speaking."
       In January of 1986 I had a job interview in an office where two of the partners were father and son.  I was interviewed by the son (older than I was at the time by at least 20 years).  I was led into his empty office and left alone there to admire the many diplomas on his “vanity wall” and all of the other interesting souvenirs of a storied legal career.  I was well acquainted with this technique, as I had been routinely instructed to lead clients into the office of one of the partners in the first firm I worked for and leave them alone there to absorb the evidence of what a great man they were about to meet.  That office belonged to a man who had been a physician and became an attorney and then a partner in a very successful medical malpractice firm.

          The office had beautiful wood paneling on the walls.  Behind the desk were all of the diplomas, certificates and licenses that he had been able to accumulate by getting medical and legal licenses in every state that would offer one by reciprocity.  In the rear of the room was a sofa and coffee table with a very attractive and expensive chess set on it – a chess set that had never been used to my knowledge.  Part of that seating group included a replica of President John F. Kennedy’s rocking chair. 

          As my interviewer entered the room, he said “So you’re in the buggy whip business”.

AWKWARD!  I had no idea what he was talking about, and was forced to admit that, rather than try to have a conversation without doing so.  He was referring to the package of legislative “reforms” which had become effective on July 1, 1985.  These included shortening the time to start a suit and reducing the fees of attorneys who handle medical malpractice cases to name a few.  I did not really see how those changes would render our professional niche “obsolete” and I left his office wondering how the interview could have gone more poorly.

          Over the course of the ensuing twenty years I did begin to see an impact of those changes on the profession and thought of that interview many times.

          Now, thirty years later, a democratic Governor has submitted a budget bill to the legislature which contains a $250,000 limit on compensation for pain and suffering and would deprive children whose brains are damaged by negligent Obstetrical care of the same right to be compensated as other people injured by someone who is not a physician.  In other words, if Governor Cuomo has his way, I and many people like me will be as employable as a worker in a buggy whip factory.  Anybody know where I can find one of those?